Bad Friday, part three

No calls, no messages, no contact. I gave him my word that he will not hear anything from me until Sunday and it's killing me. I love him so much! I told him that I would do anything to save our family and if that means that I have to make him choose, I'll do it.

I told him that whatever his decision is, he has to stand by it. He cannot change his mind. It's time that he became a man and stood up to his responsibilities. Responsibilities which he was made aware of before we even became boyfriend-girlfriend. I just hope our family means more to him than Mahadera.

I'm fond of creating what ifs and one what if that I gave him was that if there comes a time when he found himself in a situation where he had to choose between us (me and the kids) and his family, who would he choose? He told me that since he's still dependent on his family, he would choose them. But if he can stand on his own at that time, he would choose us.

During our conversation last Sunday, I told him that the "what if" situation is now an "is". I told him that he can stand up on his own now since he has already graduated from college and he can look for a job and we can help each other in raising our kids. But I knew that he wants to finish his second course (LPN) and it's Mahadera who's paying for his schooling. I know we'd probably have a better future if he finishes that course but I know that my family is on the line here and like I said, I would do anything to keep it whole.

If he chooses his family, he might as well forget us. It will be hard, I know. I even doubt if I have the strength to stand by my word but I'll try. If he chooses us, we're (he kids and I) going to live in Cavite and we can start from scratch.

I just can't let this happen again. Not when my son already loves him. Not when my daughter already recognizes him. Not when my heart and soul is already his.